Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Katie: Week 49

I've been thinking over things a lot lately.  Thinking through why I had myself set on getting down to 120 pounds by Christmas, why I got so frustrated when it wasn't happening.  And I've been thinking about some things over the past week or so.  Maybe these thoughts seem scattered.  I guess they are.  I myself haven't quite finished thinking through them and put them all together into a cohesive whole, but I thought I'd share them with you in whatever sort of in between thinking stage they're in.

Goals- Goals are funny.  Often we set goals about minute details in order to change bigger and more important things about ourselves.  (Or at least things that we deem more important.)  And we know that "by small and simple things, great things are brought to pass," but sometimes our goals can almost seem disconnected from the results we're hoping for.  For instance, other than for the sake of "meeting my goal" I could really care less about how much I weigh.  It's true.  What bugs is my tummy.  I was paranoid about it before I had Olivia, but after being pregnant once now I'm ultra paranoid about looking pregnant.  Because my tummy sticks out.  And I hate that.  And so, as a result, I set goals about how many times I'll go walking and running and what I'll eat and what I won't eat and, in general, how I spend my days.  And somehow the dislike of a tummy that sticks out becomes what my whole days is about.  And, while I do like going on walks and eating healthy food, I don't like spending all day thinking about my tummy.  On the other hand, I do think spending my time working on progressing toward being better is a good thing.  Am I doing both at once?  Am I being both self-promoting and self-degrading at the same time?  I really don't know.

Entitlement- I've been thinking a lot about entitlement.  It's a selfish and dangerous thing.  Always.  I've been thinking about this for a while now and I cannot come up with a situation in which it would be wise for us to feel entitled to something.  In a gospel sense, we might say that we feel entitled to be with our families forever if we are sealed in the temple and live righteously.  But I don't think that's right.  I think that if we've done all that then we seek for the blessings of the Lord.  He's promised us that we can be with our families forever if we're sealed in the temple and we live righteously, but we're never perfect.  We make mistakes.  I try to live righteously, but sometimes I mess up.  I think a mean thought, don't do something I should have done, do something I know I shouldn't.  So I'm really not entitled to be with my family forever.  I've been blessed with an Atoning Savior who makes up what I lack and lets me repent.  Are you following me so far?  In other words, we do our best in life--and we should--but, ultimately, every good thing comes from God, those things are blessings, and we're not entitled to blessings.

This past week- I know there are those of you who will shake your heads and roll your eyes at me when I tell you this, but here's the truth: I was really naughty last week.  I hate cookies and milk every night with Bryan and his sisters and our friends.  I didn't keep track of anything I ate.  And because the temperature outside was in the teens I think we only went on one actual walk during the whole Thanksgiving break.  It was bad, I know.  But you know what?  It was so nice.  It was nice to eat things I liked.  But even more than that it was nice to not be stressed about every single calorie that enters my body.  So maybe you (and sometimes I) will think that it was such a waste to be so stressed about my weight and work so hard and then go in the complete opposite direction, but it really was so good for me--mentally, emotionally.  I needed that break.  Because I certainly wasn't starving myself before, but it was getting to the point where I was eating as little as possible.  And even though the little calorie counter on MyFitnessPal wasn't giving me that "you haven't eaten enough calories" warning, I think it was doing bad things to my body to not be eating more.  But when you're working so hard at burning calories it's hard mentally to eat more, even if you know it's probably going to make your body function better.  So I still really like the tools on MyFitnessPal and I'll use them off and on as I see fit, but, for now at least, I'm not going to keep track of things quite so much.  I certainly don't plan to be quite so glutenous as I was over the Thanksgiving break and now that the temperatures have risen to be more reasonable I'll keep going on walks and things, but I'm not going to be writing it all down all the time.  It was just plain stressing me out too much. 

And so, now I'll post my weekly weight.  It doesn't really matter, but maybe after reading through some of what I've been thinking about you'll understand a little why I feel so blessed to still be under 130.  Because I certainly didn't deserve it after this past week.  But seeing this makes me feel so encouraged.  Even though it's up a pound from last week, it could have been up quite a few more.  And it's not.

Current weight: 129 pounds
Last week's weight: 128 pounds
Total weight loss: 41 pounds

Someday I'm going to make it to my goal weight of 120 pounds.  And I hope that along the way this sticking-out-tummy that bugs will disappear.

I'm going to keep working at it.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Christmas Spirit

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Gobble Gobble

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving is probably one of The Skinny's worst enemies, right? A day centered around stuffing your face silly is not really conducive to healthy eating habits. However, here is my tip for today: enjoy it!

Now you may be saying "wait a minute...did she just say go ahead and have whatever I want?" and the answer is YES! Eat whatever you would like today because celebrating a holiday doesn't come but once each year...but there is a catch! Only enjoy one, maybe two, bites of each thing you are indulging in; this way you don't deprive yourself and drive your mind crazy, but you also don't stuff yourself and make your body crazy either. Just take the time to really savor one or two bites...then fill up with your normal, good, healthy foods. And if you start your meal by downing a big glass of water, then you will feel fuller to begin with and desire even less of those yummy holiday goodies- I promise one or two bites of each will be plenty!

Be thankful for your body and treat it well today...it is always doing so much for you! Good luck!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Katie: Week 48 -- You were right

Well, now, here's some unexpected progress!...

Current weight: 128 pounds
Last week's weight: 129 pounds
Total weight loss: 42 pounds

Okay, so if you want to know something dumb about me it is this: I ask for advice and then I usually don't like to hear it.  So when I wrote that whiny post last week I rolled my eyes as I read all of your nice and helpful comments.  But you know what?  You all were right.

I don't remember exactly what day it was.  Friday?  I think?  But I just sort of gave up for a little bit.  The snowy weather that's come combined with my frustrations and I sort of took a little hiatus from my goals.  I talked through things with a few people who know me well and told me some things I needed to hear.  And after all that, I just felt like I needed to take the advice you all gave me and not stress so much about my goal to be 120 pounds by Christmas.  Let me explain.

When I made that goal I did it with the observation that I was moving along on-track really well, losing about a pound a week (and sometimes more) and I figured if I just kicked things up a notch, really stayed committed to my healthy eating and exercise goals, and worked just a little harder at it that meeting my goal of 120 pounds by Christmas would be a given.

At first it was great.  I was continuing to lose weight at the same quick and satisfying rate.  But then, as you all know, I got stressed.  Pretty stressed.  And the weight loss came to a screeching halt.  And I even gained a little.  And that just stressed me out more.  "Ahhh!  I'm not going to reach my goal in time!"  That was all I could think about.  Somewhere in there it had strayed from the nice, charming little goal it had started out as.

So I've decided to just keep on keepin' on and not worry about whether or not I make it there by Christmas.  After all, it's not a race.  And as much as I know you'll all look down on me for saying this, I really plan to enjoy all the yummy food that the holiday season has to offer.  I don't want to miss out on all that tasty goodness just to feel stressed and sad and only lose .2 pounds anyway.  This being said, I also plan to keep up a regular habit of healthy eating and, of course, good exercise.  I love my daily walks and even going running has been fun.  I don't plan to give those things up.  (Although I will admit that it is getting harder and harder to get myself motivated to go running now that it's getting so cold and the sidewalks are snowy and slick.  Not to mention it's usually dark outside by the time we could get started.  And I just loathe the indoor track.  Sigh...)

Also, I have made the executive decision to enjoy this current week as a vacation because--it is!  It's Thanksgiving break!  So I plan to keep going on walks and go running if we feel like it, but I'm not going to be keeping track of things on my little chart and probably not on MyFitnessPal either.  I just need a little break from the minute details for a bit. 

Anyway, that's all for now.  Hope you're all having a wonderful Tuesday.  And since I probably won't be posting again this week...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Kathy Week 47: Maintenance is Weird

Kathy's Week 47 Stats:
Two weeks ago Weight: 131
Today's Weight: 130
Starting Weight: 151
Total Weight Loss: 21 pounds

I'm still trying to figure out how to get my head around maintaining my weight.

With weight loss, there's a mission. Exercise more, eat less.

With weight maintenance, I find myself playing weird mental games with myself.
--How much (chocolate) can I eat and not gain the weight again?
--How little can I exercise and not gain it back?
Stupid, I know.
Living by these kinds of questions practically guarantees yo-yo-ing back and regaining the lost weight.

Some better questions might be:
--How can I make my food choices as healthy as possible, including my snacks?
--How can I fit a reasonable amount of healthy exercise into my life?

I found some helpful suggestions for maintaining goal weight here and here.
According to these websites, I should be getting more exercise than I am now, and it would help me to keep a food journal. Ummm...we'll see about that. I'm feeling burned out right now on maintaining a food journal, and the weather outside is frightful, making it discouraging to go out and walk. But I'm thinking about starting up with my weight-lifting program again, and I have been focusing on healthier meals the last week or so.

Speaking of healthy meals...Happy Thanksgiving!

Halloween had too much chocolate for me to handle, but I have some healthy recipes planned for our Thanksgiving meal, and I think I'll be fine.

Be sure to check the left-hand sidebar of The Skinny for the Apple-Cinnamon Sweet Potatoes recipe - so easy, so yummy, so low-calorie!

And I know that everyone has their own favorite way to cook a turkey, but my absolute favorite for quick, easy, no-mess, and moist is to cook the turkey in a Reynolds Cooking Bag. Genius.

Have fun, and enjoy the leftovers!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Whiny Post

I feel completely discouraged about trying to lose weight.  When I do the "right" things--go on walks, go running, eat right, have extra calories left over at the end of the day, drink enough water, etc., etc. I either stay at the same weight or gain weight.  But then yesterday I was so busy that I didn't even really get to go on a walk and I ate more calories than I should have.  And I lost .2 pounds.  Aghh!

I feel frustrated.  I feel like I'm playing a guessing game.  I'm on the verge of feeling superstitious.  It's ridiculous.

Anyway, just popped in to say that.  Sorry for the downer post.  But this is really what it's like sometimes.  Perhaps too much of the time for me lately.

Lately I keep wondering if I should just give up and relax and let it happen at whatever pace it's gonna happen.  I know that sounds lame, but maybe it's for the best?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Katie: Week 47

Same as last week...

Current weight: 129 pounds
Last week's weight: 129 pounds
Total weight loss: 41 pounds

I'll admit, I'm a little discouraged. I do have a few days where things just get too busy to exercise or keep track of calories, but for the most part I really have been so good about everything.  And yesterday I went on two walks--both about an hour each--and Bryan and I went running and I ate a good amount, but I definitely burned more calories than I took in... and I still came out at 129.4 this morning.  Bah.  I did make it down to 128.something last week, but things got crazy with a big Relief Society Christmas day I was in charge of and by the end of the week I was back up to 130 again, even though I really am not entirely sure why.


Despite/because of all this, I have raised my goals a little.  Instead of running 3 times a week I am now going to try and go running 5 times this week.  And I'm going to try and go on at least 1, maybe 2 walks a day whenever I can.  And, as always, I try to burn more calories than I take in, while--of course--still eating a healthy amount of the things my body needs.  I don't starve myself.

But anyway, I really am getting worried about whether or not I'll actually be able to meet my goal by Christmas.  If I do it will definitely be because of Divine Intervention.  Because, clearly, my efforts alone are not cutting it.

Oh, and before I forget (again) here are the pictures of me from last week:

Oh yeah, and one more thing.  Lately my feet have been hurting more often while I run and after I finish running.  I bought my running shoes back during my sophomore year of college (umm... four or five years ago?) and I think they're worn out and that this could be part of the problem.  But I really don't feel like shelling out the dough for new running shoes.  But is that probably the answer here?  Any input?  Because yesterday my heels were really sore when we got back from our run and while we were running the bottom of my big toes hurt.  Which is weird.  Anyway, advice would be much appreciated.

Happy Tuesday!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Friday, November 12, 2010

I know it is Friday and I am late, but I am posting anyway. :)

I have a good reason for not posting yesterday...I have been in a bit of a rut this week. Not only have I come down with a cold, but when I went to the doctor on Tuesday she told me that I was gaining too much weight. Um, excuse me? I surely can't be the hugest pregnant person ever, right? I am still exercising plus my belly always measures the right size. I have been uber-frustrated this week trying to figure out what to do about it. Not that there can be a ton done about it, except hopefully slow down the weight gain a bit.

She recommended that I go on a diabetic "diet" where I cut some carbs and fruits with lots of natural sugar and bulk up on protein and veggies...and make any carbs whole grain ones. Uh. I don't really want to! It isn't like I am eating a bunch of bad stuff- my main craving is canned peaches- and I thought pregnancy was the one time I wasn't going to have to be watching my calories and such. As it turns out, now I am more concerned about my weight than I was before I was pregnant. Nuts.

So what do you think? Has this happened to anyone else? If it is really something that needs to be done for the baby that is fine but if it is just so I have less to lose later, I want to worry about that when the time comes and just enjoy pregnancy (and the holidays, hello!) As if my emotions weren't on overdrive anyway, this has really put me through the ringer this week...I have been angry, depressed, confused, frustrated, determined, apathetic, defiant, and most definitely cranky.

I am still unsure of what I should do about it...any thoughts?

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Katie: Week 46

Same as last week...

Current weight: 129 pounds
Last week's weight: 131 pounds
Total weight loss: 41 pounds

Isn't funny how I was ecstatic about being at this weight last week, but I'm frustrated by it this week?  I guess that's part of being not-perfect.  We're always trying to be a little better.  Anyway, yes, I'm still at 129.  I'm pretty disappointed that I didn't break into 128 at all this past week, but so it goes.  Here's to hoping it'll happen this next week.  :)

Also, I have a little surprise for you all.  Are you ready?

I took pictures today!

I know, crazy, right?  Bryan and I actually happened to be home and up and ready this morning so I had him snap a couple of quick pictures.  The lighting is super bad, but--hey--beggars can't be choosers.  Not that any of you were really begging though... Anyway, here are the pictures:

Uhhh... so there are no pictures here.  Long story short, they will be up tomorrow.  Hopefully.  :)

Also, I had a yummy treat to share with you all, but I'm having issues with adding pictures to Blogger today, so perhaps that'll appear sometime in the future.

Happy Tuesday!

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Kathy Week 45: I'm not motivated...

Still hanging around at 131.

Which is not the end of the world, after all. For a 56-year-old lady like myself, 5' 3" -- a weight of 131 comes in at BMI 23.2, very much within the "normal weight" category.

Still, it's 4 pounds over my lowest weight, during the summer.

Should I care? Is this my new happy weight?
(Not quite - according to the Happy Weight Calculator, I should aim for 128.9 pounds.)

Halloween was not good for my motivation. Way too easy to have chocolate candy in the house. Better still, chocolate candy with nuts...mmmmm....

I did use the tools at myfitnesspal.com religiously last week...for one day...and then I was snacking again.

Oh, yes, indeed, I do know what to do, and how to do it. I'm just not very motivated right now...

Here's a recent photo, reading a book with a granddaughter. I don't think I look fat. There's just that little middle-aged tummy...that's where the extra pounds always settle.

I guess I need to get myself back below 130, at least.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Get Going!

Here is my tip of the day....get up and get going!!!

I know, a little late in the day for such a tip, but nevertheless...try it! I know that sometimes I think that what I need is a little rest- afterall, my body has been working hard/I've had late nights/I was on my feet all day/my workout was extra strenuous/etc. However I know from personal experience that when I do decide to let myself "rest", it does not really feel rejuvenating...it makes me feel like a slob!

Now quickly I will make a disclaimer and say that you should listen to your body and rest when you really need it. That being said, you probably don't need to rest all day like you may be tempted to do. I know it seems like taking a day to just stay in sweats and craft or read or whatnot may seem like just the thing to get you in gear again (you deserve it afterall, right?) but I promise it isn't! Get up, get dressed and go for a walk or a bike ride. Find someone to serve. Do something productive! I promise that you will feel better when you have done your hair and have on real clothes and are out about somewhere. :)

It isn't too late to do it today...go for it!

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Katie: Week 45 Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay!


Current weight: 129 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last week's weight: 131 pounds
Total weight loss: 41 pounds

Yay yay yay yay yay!!!!  I finally broke into the 120's!  Not including this week there are 7 more weeks until Christmas.  So I've just got 9 pounds left to lose in the next 7 weeks!  Yay!  And I totally feel like it's possible.

Oh, and sorry I forgot to check in last Tuesday.  Well, I didn't really forget, I just didn't get around to it.  But last Tuesday I was 131.  Woot woot!  Although, even though I didn't check in, I have been super diligent about keeping up on my goals.  And I'm especially proud of myself for staying strong even through Halloween.  I had a few pieces of candy the night of our ward Halloween party, but that was really it.  I just didn't want more than that.  And that is the part that I think is truly awesome.

As a recap of what I've been doing to reach my goals, I've been...
-entering all of my food and exercise into MyFitnessPal everyday
-striving to drink 8 glasses of water every day
-going on a walk every day
-going running 3 times each week
-doing 50 crunches every night
-eating less calories than I burn

Of course some days are better than others.  And last week I had a thing going on with my back so we had to skip running.  But I've tried to stay active no matter what and be diligent about eating fewer calories than I burn and it is totally paying off.  I really can't tell you how thrilled I was to get on the scale this morning and see it drop down into the 120's.  YAY!  I feel so close to my goal.

Also, I don't know that I've mentioned it on here before, but every Thursday on my regular blog I'm doing a "What I'm Giving Myself for Christmas" this year thing.  Basically I'm just trying to encourage others to make and meet goals by this coming Christmas.  It can be anything really, but if you're reading this on The Skinny then you're probably into fitness and weight loss, so a weight loss or fitness goal might be a good one for you if you'd like to participate.  I'd really love to have a bunch of people chime in and mention what their goals are and how happy they are to be working toward them.  It's just so deeply gratifying to see progress in myself.  Of course that's not something anyone can really give except to themselves, so I'm trying to pass on that feeling by encouraging others.  Anyway, so I'd love for you to share your goals here in the comments and of course it'd be fun to have you chime in on the linky party on my regular blog on Thursdays too.  But mostly I just want you to feel good about the progress you see in yourself.  Because the progress I've been making this past year has made such an enormous difference in my life.

Well, I guess that's it for today.  Today's going to be pretty busy, but I'll see if I can get someone to snap a picture of me and upload it later today.  :)

Happy Happy Tuesday!

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Want to write a guest post for The Skinny? E-mail Katie at kathleenann08 (at) gmail (dot) com.